By Andy Lund
Esther's morning prayers don't quite get off the ground.
(Andy on knees stage left, Esther on knees stage right)
Esther: (Yawns) Morning, Lord. What an awful day. Typical - Saturday and raining. Why can't it do that sort of thing during the week and keep to sunshine at the weekend. Sorry, Lord. Please bless me today in all that I undertake for you. Please bless aunty Flo whose leg has been giving her a bit of gip recently and uncle Ern who has trouble with his feet. Mind you, it doesn't stop him going down the pub every evening regular as clockwork. How does he do it? Come to that how does he afford to go so often. I mean, beer's not cheap and he never stops at a swift half. They say he's a real elbow lifter - his friends that is. Not that he's got so many. He's not known to stand too many rounds for other people. How aunty Flo puts up with him, I'll never know. And....oh sorry, Lord, where was I? Lord I have a real burden for Africa and the ..er.. African people. Please bless all the missionaries in er...Africa. Especially ..that nice bloke who spoke at church last week.. Simon he was called. He's going to a country beginning with Z. Zimbabwe or Zaire or Zambia. I can't exactly remember which one, but they're quite close. They're all in Africa. And he was very committed and very nice. Please bless him..whenever he goes there...whichever one it is. And Lord, (phone rings) oh who can that be?
Oh, hello Tara. No, it's all right. I was only praying. No, honestly it's all right. Well if you want, but it's important to chat. Got to keep in touch. All right, then, if you're sure. I'll call you after work. Bye.
Sorry, Lord. It was Tara. Well I suppose you knew. She's got a bit of a trouble with..well, you know. Anyway, I expect it'll sort itself out. Where was I? Ive forgotten. Well anyway, I pray for all the people in the fellowship, especially for Tanya. Yes. Well you know what she's been up to. I would never have thought it. Some people said she had it coming -well I suppose she did. But , well I mean..to do that was a bit much. I mean.. (Radio alarm goes off)
Oh blast. I forgot to turn off the alarm, sorry Lord.
Radio: Chelsea 4, Spurs 3. Manchester United 0, Liverpool 6 ...
Esther: What! I don't believe it. 6, It's got to be a mistake. I mean they'd made a great start. Well, we're going to have to concentrate on the cup now. They going to have a right go at me at work about this. Talking of which I've only got 5 minutes to get out of here. (Starts putting on clothes) What a day I've got , too. I don't know how I'm going to fit it all in. And there's that meal tonight. I must remember to check on what time it is.
Sorry, Lord, where was I? I'd just better say your special prayer - I seem to be running out of time.
(Whilst cleaning teeth) Our Father in Heaven, hallowed be your name, your Kingdom come..
Oh blast there's my lift and I haven't flossed my teeth even or had breakfast. Sorry, Lord. I'll catch you later.
Andy: O Lord, please give me a prayer life like Esther's.
© Andy Lund
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