By Walt Scheiman
Person is ready to "go into the world and spread the Gospel" but he doesn't realize that the Gospel needs to be spread in his own back yard.
pray can, stocking cap, tape measure
(Scene opens with one person sitting on couch reading the newspaper as the other one passes ready to go into the mission field. Loaded down with all the things necessary to survive.)
1: (reading paper as other person passes, notices him and puts paper down) OK, I give up what is it today?
2: What do you mean?
1: You know what I mean. What chapter did you read today?
2: Oh that.
1: Yes, that.
2: Mark, chapter 16.
1: Let me guess, "Go ye into all the world and preach the Gospel."
2: That's it all right.
1: And it's your plan to go into all the world . . .
2--. . . and preach the Gospel. Right.
1: You know Dave, you have to get a handle on this thing.
2: I'm sure I don't know what you mean.
1: Yes, you do. But if you are going to play stupid, I'll tell you. Every time you read a verse in the Bible you think that is giving you instructions to go out and do what it says.
2: Well don't you think that I should go into the world and preach the Gospel?
1: Of course I do. It's every Christian's job to spread the word of God. But not everyone is called to go out into the foreign mission field. In fact you could get yourself hurt if it's not God calling you.
2: I am prepared for every eventuality.
1: I know that I'm going to regret this but, what eventualities?
2: Well I have this (pulls out spray can).
1: What's that?
2: Alligator repellant.
1: Alligator Rep . . .
2: That's right. And it says right here on the can it also works on crocodiles, lions, ostriches, wildebeests and IRS agents.
1: (Not impressed) Yeah, great. So if you come across a lion that wants to audit your books you're all set.
2: Very funny. I also have this.
1: A stocking cap?
2: Cold weather protection. You know 80% of body heat is lost through the head.
1: Specially when there is nothing there to stop it.
2: Oh there's plenty there all right.
1: Yeah, rocks.
2: Speaking of rocks (he pulls out a slingshot).
1: Do you remember the last time you had one of those? It was just after you read about David and Goliath.
2: Oh yeah, I forgot.
1: You forgot?
2: Hey listen, she healed up quite nicely. I don't think she even remembers the incident.
1: She doesn't remember her own name.
2: You're wrong, every time I call her mom she sorta responds.
1: OK, listen. Yes, you need to spread the Gospel. Yes, witnessing is putting your faith in action, and yes there are tons of people who need to hear the Good news of Jesus Christ. You know not everyone is called to go into the foreign witness field.
2: But what about Christ's commandment?
1: There are plenty of people who need to hear about Christ right here in town, at your job, in your family. Start with them.
2: You make sense.
1: Well, thanks.
2: You're right (taking off things). Besides I have other work to do (pulls out tape measure as he exits) Just how long is a cubit.
1: (chasing him off) Now, just wait a second. (BLACKOUT)
Copyright Walt Scheiman, all rights reserved.
This script may be used without royalty payment, provided no charge is made for admission to the performance. In return the author would like to be told of any performance. He may be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org