By Marc Harrison


A wife's need to tidy the house threatens the start of a vacation.


Husband and wife


A Broom and/or duster



(Scene: A husband and wife have their bags packed and are getting ready to leave on vacation. The wife stops to straighten up the house.)

Husband: Could you please tell me what you're doing?

Wife: I'm straightening up a few things - hold your horses.

Husband: We are suppose to be leaving on vacation!

Wife: That's why I'm doing it!

Husband: Huh?

Wife: I don't want to leave a dirty house while we're gone. I'm nearly done.

Husband: Why does it matter? No one is going to be here and no one is going to visit - unless we get robbed. And I don't think a robber will care.

Wife: Very funny! You men never understand anything!

Husband: I understand we're going to miss our plane if you don't come on. I understand you're a perfectionist when it comes to this house!

Wife: I just don't like leaving a dirty house. And I am not a perfectionist! My mother was, but I'm not!

Husband: OK, so then why does it matter if we leave a few things scattered around while we're on vacation?

Wife: First of all, I won't have a good time.

Husband: How does a little dust back home keep you from having a good time on vacation?

Wife: If I leave a dirty house behind, then I'll dread coming home to it.

Husband: So you should enjoy being "ON VACATION", you should want our vacation to last as long as possible putting off having to face "the dreaded dirty house home coming"!

Wife: It doesn't work that way.

Husband: OK, so how does it work?

Wife: If I know I have to come home to a mess, then I'll spend my whole vacation thinking about cleaning house. I'll have a lousy time! If you really love me and want me to have a great vacation, then you'll stop yelling at me and help me clean up!

Husband: That's just the point! It's not that dirty! You're a perfectionist!

Wife: Well...maybe just a little bit. But I wouldn't be if you weren't such a slob!

Husband: I'm not a slob! It's just not as important to me. I live my life by GRACE.

Wife: What's that got to do with anything?

Husband: I realized that I'm not perfect and never will be. And if God can accept me even though I'm not perfect, I figure you should too.

Wife: Number 1, I'm not God. And number 2, I think you're just using this as an excuse for the fact that you're a slob and don't even try to change!

Husband: If I can't ever be perfect, then why waste time trying?

Wife: Because God wants us to try our best. And I don't think you should use Him as an excuse for being a slob!

Husband: You think I would use God as an excuse to not clean house?

Wife: Yes I do!

Husband: Well, I might - but if we don't hurry, we're going to spend whole our vacation cleaning house. Planes don't wait!

Wife: It only takes 20 minutes to get to the airport and our plane doesn't leave for 2 hours! Don't you think you're a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to getting to the airport early?

Husband: Huh?

Wife: Let's go dear or we'll miss our plane!



© Marc Harrison
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