The 50 Yard Line

By Terri Savage

Summary

In this skit, Ed has tickets to the big game, but no transportation. His friend Larry was supposed to pick them up so they could go to the game together, but ran into an old high school friend, Tina. As Ed desperately tries getting another ride, Larry and Tina make plans to get the tickets from Ed and go to the game instead.

Scriptures

Proverbs 27:10, Philippians 2:3-4, James 4:1-3

Characters

Ed - Guy with tickets, but no transportation - age 25 or older
Larry - Friend with misguided priorities - age 25 or older
Tina - age 25 or older
Mike - off stage voice
Darryl - off stage voice
Troy - off stage voice

Script

(Scene: Ed is pacing and getting frustrated because his buddy Larry has not yet arrived to pick him up for the Monday Night Football game. Scene opens with Ed hanging up the phone and loudly saying:)

Ed: Larry - where are you, man?! You were supposed to be here an hour ago! (paces some more then decides to call other people - dials phone) All characters contacted by phone will be off stage, most likely in the sound booth reading their parts using a hand held mike.

Mike: Yeah, this is Mike

Ed: Hey, this is Ed. Mikey, my boy, are you going to be glad you answered! I've got 2 tickets to tonight's game!

Mike: Sorry man, I can't go.

Ed: But they're good seats - this is a once in a lifetime opportunity man!

Mike: I can't. Melissa's at her Monday night ladies Bible Study. Remember me telling you about it? She goes to her Bible group and I stay home with the kids. I get 'em in bed by 8:45 and I've got Monday Night Football all to myself!! It's a sweet setup, and I can't change it.

Ed: All right, I'll call someone else. Thanks. (hangs up and dials another number)

Darryl: (sounding sort of rushed) Hello

Ed: Darryl, have I got a deal for you! I've got 2 tickets to the game tonight. If you just swing by and pick me up we'll be on the 50-yard line, man, in half an hour!

Darryl: You're kidding!?! Man, if you'd only called earlier! The wife and kids are in the car, we're going out to eat. Man! I wish I'd known! Say, why don't you call Larry?

Ed: He's the one I'm supposed to go with, but I can't find him.

Darryl: Go without him.

Ed: I would but my car is in the shop and I need a ride. I'll call someone else.

(hangs up and dials another number) (LIGHTS OUT ON THAT SIDE AS HE DIALS)

(LIGHTS UP ON THE OPPOSITE STAGE)

Tina: I still can't believe I ran into you after all these years. And I've had so much fun today.

Larry: Yeah, it's pretty cool, huh? I've had such a great time- I wish I didn't have to go.

Tina: Yeah, it would be nice if this evening didn't have to end.

Larry: Well, I guess I don't have to keep my plans. I was really looking forward to what I was going to do, but I'd give it up to be with you a little longer.

Tina: Well, I sort of have a standing reservation for Monday nights for a few months, and I really don't want to miss it - especially tonight. Say, I don't suppose you'd consider going with me?

Larry: Well uh, what exactly do you have planned? (say it cautiously and with uncertainty)

Tina: Monday night football.

Larry: You're kidding! You actually like football?

Tina: I LOVE football! And tonight, man, it's Brett Favre and company against the Bucs! I can't miss it!

Larry: Yeah, well I have tickets - ya wanna go?

Tina: Why didn't you tell me sooner? If we leave right now we'll probably miss the opening kick off - but I can live with that!

Larry: Great! All I have to do is swing by Ed's house and pick up the tickets.

Tina: Cool! Can we swing by my apartment real quick, too? I have a few accessories I'd like to pick up!

Larry: Sure.

(LIGHTS OUT ON THEIR SIDE, LIGHTS UP ON ED)

Ed: (hanging up the phone in disgust) I can't believe I can't find anyone who can go to the game! I'm holding prime tickets and can't get there! Daggone it Larry, where are you!?! (Pauses, then remembers someone else. Dials the phone.)

Troy: Yeah, hello.

Ed: Hey Troy, it's Ed. Man I have got the deal of the century! I have 2 tickets to tonight's game and all you have to do is pick me up.

Troy: Awe man - I can't. Everybody's over at my house to watch the game! I can't cut out on 'em. Man, if only they weren't here! If only you'd called earlier! Dude, I've got go - everyone's inside waiting on me. Sorry.

Ed: Yeah. (hangs up and picks up the TV remote to turn up the volume) I can't believe I'm stuck at home to watch it on TV!

(Larry dons a Bucs jersey and pirate hat, while Tina has added her Green Bay jersey and Cheesehead hat. Ed hears knocking at the door opens it up and in comes Larry and Tina.. The "Monday Night Football theme begins to play and Larry and Tina sing along with it - Ed stares in disbelief.)

Ed: Man, where have you been!?! I've been calling everywhere looking for you!

Larry: I ran into Tina this afternoon. Remember Tina, from High School? Sorry man, I lost track of time.

Ed: Well at this point we're going to miss the first quarter!

Larry: Yeah, I know, but I can't miss the Battle of the Bays on the 50-yard line! Thanks for the tickets, Dude. (Larry swipes them out of Ed's hand as he and Tina head towards the door.)

(Larry and Tina leave and Ed turns to face the audience with disbelief, disgust and frustration all over his face. Might even look at his hand where he once held the tickets and look wildly around.)

LIGHTS OUT

.................................

This drama may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged. In exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the drama is performed. She may be contacted at: Terri.Savage@specialtycare.net