By Warren Judkins
Two sheep discuss the announcement by the angels of the Christ-child's advent.
Shaun and Barny (2 sheep)
(Note: lean on all the sheep puns, so that people groan)
Shaun: (entering) ......oh com on, Baaaarny, ewe expect me to believe that!
Barny: It's true, Shaun, cross my heart and hope to roast. Have I ever pulled the wool over your eyes before?
Shaun: Nope. You're a bit of a dag, but I've got to admit you've never fleeced anyone.
Barny: Well, there - do you believe me?
Shaun: I'm trying to, but a sky full of singing stars?
Barny: That's what I saw, Shaun. Big bright, brilliant baritones, bursting with boisterous bellowing...
Shaun: Forget the poetry, just tell me what happened!
Barny: All right. There we all were, Ewenice, Stu, Agnes, Mint Sauce and the mob...
Shaun: (interjecting) How did he get his name?
Barny: Don't ask! There we were, at the end of a quiet evening, the womenfolk knitting, the men spinning a good yarn, when all of a sudden this star pops open and starts speaking!
Shaun: Well I'll be shorn!
Barny: You are Shaun.
Shaun: Oh, yeah. But are you sure it was a star?
Barny: What else could it have been? It shone, it was up in the sky, and it was beautiful.
Shaun: But stars don't normally speak. And how big did you say this...star... was?
Barny: Oh, billions of miles across, if you count the gas cloud, but then it's hundreds of light years away...
Shaun: No, you woolly wally, the one that talked to you!
Barny: Oh, well it's hard to say. It felt really close and looked a bit like a human, but it could have been a world away and the size of a galaxy. You know how it is with size.
Shaun: (far-off dreamy look, but deliberate) Something from a world away coming close...
Barny: (more to himself than anyone) I mean, if you hold up your hoof to your eye, you can block out the whole Milky Way...
Shaun: (emphatically) Something vast becoming man...
Barny: But anyway, it sure was a special sight. Made my wool stand on end. (notices Shaun) You all right there? You look like you've seen a freezing works.
Shaun: I've just remembered what Chops from in town told me.
Barny: These townies! "Chops!" What kind of name is that for a sheep?
Shaun: Tongue in cheek, I'd say.
Barny: What did he say?
Shaun: That same night you're bleating about, he said the most amazing thing happened!
Barny: Singing stars?
Shaun: Something from a world away coming close.
Barny: Ooo, you're giving me goose-bumps.
Shaun: Something vast becoming the size of a man.
Barny: What'd he see? What'd he see?
Shaun: (solemnly, joyfully) A little baby. (They look at each other in silence for a moment.)
Barny: (slightly miffed) And you think that's more earth-shattering than a sky-full of singers!?
Shaun: (gently) Baaarny, I think they were angels.
Barny: (delighted) Wow, I saw something on earth that lives in heaven? Now that's something.
Shaun: That is something. But I think old Chops is one up on you.
Barny: (a touch annoyed) Yeah? How's that?
Shaun: He's seen something from heaven that lives on earth. (Barny gives a conceding nod as they exit.)
© Warren Judkins 1998
All rights reserved
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged.
In exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the play is performed.
He may be contacted at: email@example.com