Christmas Shorts

By Glenn A. Hascall

Summary

Three short pieces on the theme preparing for the holidays. These can be used as stand alone pieces or as
fillers between scenes of a larger dramatic piece.
 

The Mall of Marketable Goods

by Glenn A. Hascall

(A spoof on holiday advertising seeking ways to get you to spend more than you have. 
Read it overly happy - over dramatic.)

Announcer: What is the real meaning of Christmas? For many it is luscious
chocolate oranges in festive foil, a rope of cranberries and popcorn,
aromatic clove, an orchestra of dancing lights or perhaps the ever popular
seven swans a swimming.

Each year the Mall of Marketable goods works hard to bring the real spirit
of the holiday to you and your family. From dainty hand finished Christmas
decorations from Northcobleslavovia to festive Santa wear made by genuine
elves in the far north. We know how much Christmas means to you, so we stand
ready to make your holiday shine with all the warmth and charm that high
quality goods can provide. Remember when we say High Quality we mean - bring
your credit card. (Good natured chuckle)

The Mall of Marketable Goods is open 24 hours a day for your convenience and
yes, we have creative credit plans that allow you to get everything you want
for the holidays with a multi-year repayment plan.

And remember with every purchase over a thousand dollars drop by our
Christmas Confections Cafe and pick up a free piece of holiday fudge, just
right for that holiday appetite. (The following line is intended to be
redundant) The Mall of Marketable Goods - more than a place to buy for
Christmas, itís also a place where you can purchase all of your holiday
needs. On the corners of Capital and Money Changer Drive. We look forward to
your visit this holiday.

Remember our motto, why purchase tomorrow what you can get today on credit.

The Mall of Marketable goods is a proud member of the gotta-have-it business
bureau.

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Census - A Voluntary Requirement?

(If available - special report type music in)

ANNOUNCER: And now a special report from the Ro-maniacal News Network

NEWSCASTER: Today the Roman government, in an ongoing effort to reach out to
those who gain benefit from the services of our vast governmental entities,
announced a nationwide census.  Sources close to Caesar Augustus and
Governor Quirinius say that the primary purpose for this citizen count is to
make sure no one feels left out of the process. What that means in lay terms
is that our government is seeking to assure themselves that they are
properly compensated for their services. Volunteers are asked to return to
the city of their ancestors to take part in a census. This will enable our
government to properly assess the actual numbers of citizens that should be
taxed. Authorities stress that such volunteerism is mandatory.

The government admits that there will be no reimbursements for lost wages,
travel expenses or lodging associated with the required pilgrimage. However
they feel that the festive atmosphere and the opportunity to visit with
family will make the trip well worth the effort.

Sources indicate that lodging may be difficult to come by in some
communities, but are certain that our country will pull together and make
this required, voluntary census a huge success.

In other news....

Tax revenues are expected to increase dramatically in the coming months,
full story at 11.

(Bring Special Report music up) 
Reporting for RNN, I'm Apollo Augustine.
Good day.

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Christmas Day

SYNOPSIS: A lesson in contrasts using a popular Christams song to demonstrate 
the view of Christmas from the perspective of a modern woman and Mary. 
Can be read or sung (to the tune Silver Bells).

CAST

MARY
MODERN WOMAN

Script

READER # 1 (Modern day)
City Sidewalks, busy sidewalks.
Dressed in Holiday style
In the air
Thereís a feeling
of Christmas

READER # 2 (Mary)
Village sidewalks, busy sidewalks
Dressed in first century style
In the air
Thereís a distinct smell
of camels

READER # 1:
Children laughing
People passing
Meeting smile after smile
And on every street corner youíll hear

Silver bells, silver bells
Itís Christmas time in the city
Ring-a-ling, hear them ring
Soon it will be Christmas day.

READER # 2 (Looks at reader one like sheís nuts)
Children laughing
People passing
Yet, weíre turned away
On every street corner we hear

Thereís no room. Thereís no room
Itís census time in the city
My babyís due. Oh, what to do
Soon it will be Christmas day.

READER # 1:
Strings of street lights
Even stop lights
Blink and bright red and green
As the shoppers rush home with their treasures

READER # 2:
Thereís a manger
Cause were strangers
And weíve no place to go
As the cattle roam
Round seeking fodder

READER # 1:

Hear the snow crunch
See the kids bunch
This is Santaís big scene
And above all this bustle
Youíll hear

Silver bells, silver bells,
Itís Christmas time in the city
Ring-a-ling, hear them sing
Soon it will be Christmas day

READER # 2:
Hear the goats crunch
As they have lunch
We are making no scene
If youíre quiet enough
You might hear

Glory, Peace, Good will to you
Itís Christmas time in the village
Christ the King, is cause to sing
Praise God, it is Christmas day.

(Both look at each other as if they are crazy and walk off opposite sides of
the stage).
............................................................
Copyright 2001 by Glenn A. Hascall & CMI Publishing
If you use any of these scripts would you please be so kind as to let us know? glenn.hascall<a>gmail.com